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| John Lello He gave his all. |
The girls and I walked him down to the boat to see him off. He gave the girls their hugs and said good-by and then it was my turn. As I hugged John good-by this time, I didn’t want to let him go. We watched him climb into the boat along with the hired chainsaw operator, his assistant, the clinic nurse and his assistant. We than began waving good-by until we couldn’t see him anymore. The girls and I slowly walked back up the hill to our home with an emptiness that wouldn’t go away. The routine of the day eventually occupied our time.
We were surprised to see John’s boatman show up a few days later for more chain saw oil and would be returning to Ama Sunday morning. “Hey girls, let us make cards and right letters to daddy showing how much we love and miss him”, I said. “Ya hoo”, they cried. Cutting, coloring and pasting began in earnest while I began writing a long letter to John. The cards, letters and goodies were sent on their way.
Through the dense fog of the night a heavy rain had begun to fall on November 26, 2012. While preparing to retire for the night, I could faintly pick out the sounds of wailing further down the river. Looking out the window toward the village I knew this was not unusual but this time it seemed different. The sounds were coming closer and becoming louder. My thoughts were interrupted with Abby and Alissa calling, “Mom, are you coming”, we are really tired”? I proceeded down the hallway to put the girls to bed when a loud banging on the door caused me to freeze.
“Who would be visiting us so late at night”, I thought. Quickly I instructed the girls in a loud whisper to turn off their flashlights. The banging continued even louder this time and through the night came a distressed voice calling, “Pam, it is Colin”. Oh! Colin was from the church so I hastened to the door to find out what could possibly be wrong.
Opening the door I looked out into the darkness and heard the words that I will never forget. “Pam, John is dead”. No! I cried out, John is not dead”. “Yes, repeated Colin, “Your John is dead”. By this time the girls had joined me and we raced down the stairs into the pouring rain not knowing where to go or what to do. Faintly in the mist I saw village men and yelled out to them, “Tokengo, where is Tokengo”? He was the nurse for the clinic, a good friend to John and a big brother to the girls, so I turned to him for support.
Stumbling down the steep hill toward the river we hurried through the darkness hoping the news about John was a mistake. Just before we arrived a group of women met us and redirected us back up to the clinic. By this time it seemed like the whole village had surrounded us as we entered into the building.
There was John, my best friend and the girl’s daddy, lying on the stretcher so still and lifeless. Tokengo was already listening for signs of breathing or a heart beat. He tried over and over again and finally motioned the girls and I outside and back to the house. He proceeded to speak with tears streaming down his face, “Pam, there isn’t anything that I can do, I am so sorry”. I couldn’t hold in the fear that I felt any longer and began to cry. Returning to the clinic with Tokengo and the girls I just starred and pleaded with God to perform a miracle like He did with Lazarus.
As the girls and I left the clinic again a helpless feeling began to flow all through me. I knew the next step had to be contacting Adventist Frontier Missions and report the accident. While the rain continued to fall I proceeded to hook up the satellite phone and prayed that it would make the connection this time. The phone began ringing and then a voice answered, “Hello, this is Lawrence Burn, how can I help you”. “Lawrence, this is Pam in Papua New Guinea. There has been an accident and John is dead”. “What did you say”, repeated Lawrence. Again I repeated myself and then I just broke down and cried. “Lawrence, what do I do now, please help me”, I sobbed. I returned to the clinic hoping once again that I would wake up from this horrible dream and that I would find John assisting Tokengo with another patient. But it was not to be and once again I stared down at my husband and his lifeless form lying on the stretcher.
As the girls and I returned to the house a few men were waiting for us. Elder Mica, John’s boatman and a good friend began explaining what had happened in the woods that afternoon at 3pm. Everyone was standing around waiting for the next tree to be cut down when a branch connected to a jungle vine 130 feet above broke. Everyone heard the sound and began to run for fear of what was falling. John and Michael grabbed each other to get out of the way when the branch fell, hitting John on the head and knocking him to the ground. I thank and praise the Lord that he was killed instantly and did not have to suffer. The closet medical services were 8 hours away by motor canoe. Later we found his scull had been cracked, his neck broken and his right arm also broken in two places.
The sun came up early the next morning but I had a hard time noticing it because my heart ached deep within. Making my way outside I tried again to connect with AFM. For the next three hours I sat on the hill over looking the valley, rivers and mountains trying to sort out all that had recently happened in the last 10 hours.
Everything seemed so over whelming and I began to cry uncontrollably. I looked up in the sky full of beautiful fluffy clouds and cried to the Lord. “Oh Lord! Please help me through this difficult time. I cannot do it on my own. Give me the strength and peace that I need”, I prayed. Instantly I felt such peace flowing through me that I knew God was with me and cared about our future.
Although I knew that God was with us, I still had the question, “Why”! Sitting on the hill in front of our mission home I had time to reflect on the last nine months of our lives. We fully believed that God had called us to Papua New Guinea to serve in his mission field.
When we first arrived at May River mission, it did not take long for the news to spread through the jungle that the “Prayed for Missionary family” had finally arrived. People would walk days in the jungle to visit us and ask for help. John definitely had the heart for people and was there to help them in any way possible. He visited villages up and down the river meeting church members and encouraging them. People were asking for Bibles, song books, literacy books for their children which we helped supply. He began working on a student missionary program so we could reach more villages for Jesus. He also heard about a school that had closed because teachers would not come out to the remote areas to teach the children. He strongly believed in education and began working on fixing the classrooms in the village of Imombi. Finally three teachers had agreed to come and the school was planning to open in January of this year.
As word began to travel more villages began requesting John’s help. John traveled from village to village giving them hope, encouragement and most of all heart felt love for them. In meeting the needs of the people He knew they would see and experience the love of Jesus.
The sound of the helicopter brought my thoughts back to the present and soon the girls and I would be taking John to Port Moresby funeral home. Walking away from our home for the last nine months was really hard. I had begun to love these people and settle into our new lifestyle. Loud crying could be heard while the whole village led us up to the aircraft. But somehow I couldn’t leave without giving the people some type of encouragement and hope for the future.
Just before climbing into the plane I spoke with the people. “Please do not give up and keep looking to Jesus. Encourage each other and I will do my best to find another missionary to carry on the work that John began. We worship a good God who loves and cares for us. I love all of you and if I do not see you again on this earth, we will meet together join on that glorious resurrection morning when Jesus will take us all to heaven”.
As the helicopter took off I looked down on the hopeless faces of the people in May River. The Missionary they had prayed for so long was being taken away from them too quickly. “Oh God”, I cried. “Why did this have to happen”? Again I felt the emptiness and loneliness sitting there in the plane. Once again I needed the assurance of God’s presence in my life. “Look mommy, look at the beautiful rainbow that is in the clouds”, said Abby. I tried to be excited about their first helicopter ride but I just couldn’t. God is so good though, later I found out from Tonkengo that the same rainbow that Abby saw was circling the helicopter the whole way to town. Again God had shown me that He was with us, loved us and cared about our future.
My heart went out to the people as we flew away from the jungle. We had answered God’s call in reaching out to the people in the Sepik Region of PNG. I had witnessed over and over John and our family living out Matthew 25:35. We invited people to eat at our table, we provided them with clean water, we gave strangers a place to stay, clothes were provided to those in need and we visited those who where sick and dying. Satan wasn’t happy with the work that John was doing and did his best to stop the work. But, God is more powerful and has wonderful things planned for the future because John laid down his life for the people of Papua New Guinea.
John was a wonderful and spiritual man and was ready to fall asleep in Jesus until He comes again. You see, John mentioned before we left the states that he wanted to be working in God’s mission field until He comes. With tears streaming down my face once again, I realized that John did get that wish, for he was working in God’s mission field and the next thing he will see is Jesus’ face. Even though I miss him greatly, I would never wish for him to return to this horrible sinful world.
Flying home on the plane gave me many more hours to cry, pray and think about the future of our people and the surrounding villages. My heart continues to ache for the people of Papua New Guinea and I will continue to pray for someone to take John’s place. Who will continue to nurture them and bring them closer to Jesus? I don’t know! Who will bring teachers in for the children and start schools? I don’t know! Who will continue to open up airstrips so health services will be brought in? I don’t know!
“O Lord, my heart is so heavy right now with many questions and no answers. I continue to ask you for strength each and every day, but also for the people that we left behind. They are still mourning the loss of their “prayed for missionary” and now wondering what will happen next. I wanted so bad to stay and continue John’s work, but I knew that wasn’t possible on my own. “Lord you are such a loving, understanding and caring God. I know that you love those people with all your heart. Keep me patient until you review to us the next, missionary”, I prayed.
Yes, even though I am praying for someone to continue our work, God has given the call for everyone to spread the gospel to the whole world, to give our all for the service of the Lord. We live in such comfort and ease that we don’t really notice what the needs of others are around us. Are we willing to give up our expensive cars, homes, entertainment and fancy clothes for the Lords’ work? Are we willing to step out of the comfort of our homes to reach the unreached for Jesus Christ? Jesus is coming soon and we don’t have long to wait.
I challenge each and every one of you to pray and step out in faith for your Lord Jesus Christ. Ask Him what His will is for you and where He would want you to go. Then, be willing to follow no matter what it costs. There is no better place to be then where God wants you to be. May the Holy Spirit touch your heart in serving the Lord, today.
